Burgled in the Burgle
Published: Tue, 09/08/15
I call it that because of all the crime here.
And, Sunday, irony decided to take a big, wet bite out of elBenbo's bootay.
Here's what happened:
I left the house to go to my Sunday Wing Chun Kung Fu lesson. And, in the two hours I was gone, in broad daylight, some thieves broke in, ransacked the place (it looked an FBI raid), stole some valuables, and left before I got back. The cops said (and I suspect they’re right) I was targeted. It was way too much of a coincidence. They probably had staked out the elBenbo’s lair for a while, learned my routine, and then struck when the opportunity presented itself.
A few people have said they’d feel violated.
Me?
Not violated, just stupid for letting it happen.
(I could have done WAY more to prevent this, and should have.)
But really, what I am is grateful.
Why?
Many reasons.
For one, besides the fact I got off easy (unlike, for example, when my friend Doberman Dan Gallapoo woke up to an intruder standing over his bed, now *that* is pressure…), they didn’t harm my dog. I experienced true terror when I walked in, saw the place turned upside down, and called my dog — who usually greets me at the door — and her not running to me. When I briefly sold in the dog niche, I remember reading about the little-talked about crime where addicts (the cops all said it was addicts desperate for cash who most likely burgled me), to earn some money for their next fix, steal dogs right out of front yards and cars to sell to unethical animal testing labs or puppy farms. Or, of burglars who poison dogs to keep them quiet. Or, the really psychopathic criminals who will just as soon kill a dog than try to shut it up or get it out of their way.
But, they didn’t kill, steal, or harm my dog.
They put her in the guest room where she hid under the bed.
(It’s the little things…)
Another reason I’m grateful:
They didn’t steal my computers.
That would have put my business in chaos. Even though I have things backed up, I would have had to get a new computer, wait for that, and even then I’m not sure how recently I last had things backed up on my external hard drive.
Yet another reason I’m grateful:
I didn’t walk in on them.
If I had, they’d have had two (of my own) loaded guns on me.
And, well, you do the math…
More:
My paranoia has finally been validated to my friends and loved ones. They now “get” it. Even me, who thought he was careful and had my bases covered, got “got.” And they know that, if a guy like me can get got, then people who naively think this would never happen to them are easy pickings.
Here’s another reason I'm grateful:
I learned some valuable lessons from the experience.
Lessons worth far more than the stolen goods — like you can never really hide valuables in a house (I thought mine were hidden really well, wrong) and you can never be too prepared.
So anyway, that’s that.
I still hope to catch the perps.
The cops lifted some prints amongst other things. And, steps have already been taken to make sure it never happens again (at least without me and the cops knowing the very moment it does, so I can nail the bastards).
But, either way, lock ye your doors and windows.
Assume someone's scoping your home now.
And, yes, watch your gluteus assimus.
After all, someone could be targeting you as you read this…
Ben Settle
P.S. There is yet one more thing to be grateful for.
It’s about what these criminals *didn’t* take that was far more valuable than the stuff they did. My friend Kevin Rogers did a short 3-minute video about this a little while ago when something similar happened to him.
I highly recommend watching it:
(And I usually hate watching videos)
https://www.facebook.com/kevin.rogers23/videos/10206982842554805/