Society-unapproved list-building secrets for your business’s tender arms
Published: Mon, 03/01/21
♥ Not only did I not ask Stefania’s dad for his marriage blessing last year, I didn’t even ask Stefania — I told her it was time and that was that
♥ I spent a grand total of $400 on her wedding ring that she picked out and simply sent me an email with a link to buy it
♥ She not only draws my bath & won’t allow anyone else fix me a plate… but she routinely does things that freaks other wives out, like standing next to me for over an hour straight holding up a menu over my face to shield my milky white skin from being burned while sitting in the sun at an outdoor bar
etc etc etc
Not going to reprint the whole thing here.
But I will reprint an email Stefania sent me shortly after:
===
I bet you a million monopoly bucks that people misunderstood your Valentine's post to think I just do whatever you want and don't internally like it, because it's “compromise"
But they’re playing connect 4, and I'm getting my PhD in elBenbo
I wasn't shielding your face with a menu because "oh no, my master's skin...!" It gave me a reason to stand super close to you and giggle while you had your arm around my waist, and i know the more I do that, the more you squeeze. Bonus points for us both looking good to the rest of the mastermind (and contemptuous to the wives) two-fold
Same reason why I’d rather hang out with you in the hotel bar than go to whatever shopping trip with the wives... why do the boring thing when I can have so much fun with you?
They think you keep me in captivity but I’m just an earth orbiting around my sun…We didn’t “create a world,” we have a whole ass solar system.
And I’m not going to comment on it to virtue signal to the world about how much I love my man, I’d rather just tell him Directly
===
Anyway, there’s more to this story for businesses.
And the bonus elBenbo’s Lair insert inside the March “Email Players” issue goes into how all this can help you have a more responsive and more profitable email list.
It’s all in the curation.
And in the testing.
And, yes, in the squeezing.
I’m sending this to the printer before bed here in a few.
So this’ll be the last warning.
If you want to subscribe in time for this issue, hit that sexy link below, Tiger:
https://www.EmailPlayers.com
Ben Settle
P.S. When Stefania butters my bread — as she wouldn’t dream of letting me do that, either — she always quotes what her mom would say if she saw her doing it:
“he doesn’t have hands?”
I almost do this just for the entertainment at this point…